Clarimonde or La Morte Amoureuse by Théophile Gautier

“La Morte Amoureuse” (“The Lifeless Leman”) by Théophile Gautier, revealed in 1836, is a haunting and lyrical story of affection and vampirism. The story facilities on Romuald, a younger priest, who’s torn between his sacred vows and his passionate love for the mysterious and delightful Clarimonde. After her demise, Clarimonde returns as a vampire, seducing Romuald and drawing him right into a nocturnal existence full of forbidden pleasures and ethical dilemmas. Right here, translated By Lafcadio Hearn (1908)

La Morte Amoureuse

Brother, you ask me if I’ve ever liked. Sure. My story is a wierd and horrible one; and although I’m sixty-six years of age, I scarcely dare even now to disturb the ashes of that reminiscence. To you I can refuse nothing; however I mustn’t relate such a story to any much less skilled thoughts. So unusual had been the circumstances of my story, that I can scarcely imagine myself to have ever really been a celebration to them. For greater than three years I remained the sufferer of a most singular and diabolical phantasm. Poor nation priest although I used to be, I led each night time in a dream—would to God it had been all a dream!—a most worldly life, a damning life, a lifetime of Sardanapalus. One single look too freely forged upon a girl well-nigh triggered me to lose my soul; however lastly by the grace of God and the help of my patron saint, I succeeded in casting out the evil spirit that possessed me. My day by day life was lengthy interwoven with a nocturnal lifetime of a very completely different character. By day I used to be a priest of the Lord, occupied with prayer and sacred issues; by night time, from the moment that I closed my eyes I turned a younger nobleman, a advantageous connoisseur in girls, canines, and horses; playing, ingesting, and blaspheming; and once I awoke at early dawn, it appeared to me, then again, that I had been sleeping, and had solely dreamed that I used to be a priest. Of this somnambulistic life there now stays to me solely the recollection of sure scenes and phrases which I can not banish from my reminiscence; however though I by no means really left the partitions of my presbytery, one would assume to listen to me converse that I had been a person who, weary of all worldly pleasures, had change into a non secular, looking for to finish a tempestuous life within the service of God, slightly than a humble seminarist who has grown outdated on this obscure curacy, located within the depths of the woods and even remoted from the lifetime of the century.

Sure, I’ve liked as none on this planet ever liked—with an insensate and livid ardour—so violent that I’m astonished it didn’t trigger my coronary heart to burst asunder. Ah, what nights—what nights!

From my earliest childhood I had felt a vocation to the priesthood, so that every one my research had been directed with that concept in view. As much as the age of twenty-four my life had been solely a protracted novitiate. Having accomplished my course of theology I successively acquired all of the minor orders, and my superiors judged me worthy, regardless of my youth, to go the final terrible diploma. My ordination was mounted for Easter week.

I had by no means gone into the world. My world was confined by the partitions of the school and the seminary. I knew in a obscure form of a method that there was one thing known as Lady, however I by no means permitted my ideas to dwell on such a topic, and I lived in a state of good innocence. Twice a yr solely I noticed my infirm and aged mom, and in these visits had been comprised my sole relations with the outer world.

I regretted nothing; I felt not the least hesitation at taking the final irrevocable step; I used to be full of pleasure and impatience. By no means did a betrothed lover rely the sluggish hours with extra feverish passion; I slept solely to dream that I used to be saying mass; I believed there could possibly be nothing on this planet extra pleasant than to be a priest; I might have refused to be a king or a poet in desire. My ambition may conceive of no loftier goal.

I let you know this so as to present you that what occurred to me couldn’t have occurred within the pure order of issues, and to allow you to grasp that I used to be the sufferer of an inexplicable fascination.

Finally the good day got here. I walked to the church with a step so gentle that I fancied myself sustained in air, or that I had wings upon my shoulders. I believed myself an angel, and questioned on the sombre and considerate faces of my companions, for there have been a number of of us. I had handed all of the night time in prayer, and was in a situation wellnigh bordering on ecstasy. The bishop, a venerable outdated man, appeared to me God the Father leaning over His Eternity, and I beheld Heaven via the vault of the temple.

You effectively know the small print of that ceremony—the benediction, the communion underneath each varieties, the anointing of the palms of the palms with the Oil of Catechumens, after which the holy sacrifice provided in live performance with the bishop.

Ah, really spake Job when he declared that the imprudent man is one who hath not made a covenant along with his eyes! I unintentionally lifted my head, which till then I had stored down, and beheld earlier than me, so shut that it appeared that I may have touched her—though she was really a substantial distance from me and on the additional facet of the sanctuary railing—a younger lady of extraordinary magnificence, and attired with royal magnificence. It appeared as if scales had abruptly fallen from my eyes. I felt like a blind man who unexpectedly recovers his sight. The bishop, so radiantly superb however an prompt earlier than, abruptly vanished away, the tapers paled upon their golden candlesticks like stars within the daybreak, and an unlimited darkness appeared to fill the entire church. The charming creature appeared in brilliant aid in opposition to the background of that darkness, like some angelic revelation. She appeared herself radiant, and radiating gentle slightly than receiving it.

I lowered my eyelids, firmly resolved to not once more open them, that I won’t be influenced by exterior objects, for distraction had steadily taken possession of me till I hardly knew what I used to be doing.

In one other minute, however, I reopened my eyes, for via my eyelashes I nonetheless beheld her, all glowing with prismatic colors, and surrounded with such a penumbra as one beholds in gazing on the solar.

Oh, how lovely she was! The best painters, who adopted supreme magnificence into heaven itself, and thence introduced again to earth the true portrait of the Madonna, by no means of their delineations even approached that wildly lovely actuality which I noticed earlier than me. Neither the verses of the poet nor the palette of the artist may convey any conception of her. She was slightly tall, with a type and bearing of a goddess. Her hair, of a delicate blonde hue, was parted within the midst and flowed again over her temples in two rivers of rippling gold; she appeared a diademed queen. Her brow, bluish-white in its transparency, prolonged its calm breadth above the arches of her eyebrows, which by a wierd singularity had been virtually black, and admirably relieved the impact of sea-green eyes of unsustainable vivacity and brilliancy. What eyes! With a single flash they may have determined a person’s future. They’d a life, a limpidity, an passion, a damp gentle which I’ve by no means seen in human eyes; they shot forth rays like arrows, which I may distinctly see enter my coronary heart. I do know not if the fireplace which illumined them got here from heaven or from hell, however assuredly it got here from one or the opposite. That lady was both an angel or a demon, maybe each. Assuredly she by no means sprang from the flank of Eve, our widespread mom. Enamel of probably the most lustrous pearl gleamed in her ruddy smile, and at each inflection of her lips little dimples appeared within the satiny rose of her lovable cheeks. There was a delicacy and pleasure within the regal define of her nostrils bespeaking noble blood. Agate gleams performed over the sleek lustrous pores and skin of her half-bare shoulders, and strings of nice blonde pearls—virtually equal to her neck in great thing about color—descended upon her bosom. Every now and then she elevated her head with the undulating grace of a startled serpent or peacock, thereby imparting a quivering movement to the excessive lace ruff which surrounded it like a silver trellis-work.

She wore a gown of orange-red velvet, and from her broad ermine-lined sleeves there peeped forth patrician palms of infinite delicacy, and so ideally clear that, just like the fingers of Aurora, they permitted the sunshine to shine via them.

All these particulars I can recollect at this second as plainly as if they had been of yesterday, for however I used to be drastically troubled on the time, nothing escaped me; the faintest contact of shading, the little darkish speck on the level of the chin, the imperceptible down on the corners of the lips, the velvety floss upon the forehead, the quivering shadows of the eyelashes upon the cheeks—I may discover the whole lot with astonishing lucidity of notion.

And gazing I felt opening inside me gates that had till then remained closed; vents lengthy obstructed turned all clear, allowing glimpses of unfamiliar views inside; life abruptly made itself seen to me underneath a very novel facet. I felt as if I had simply been born into a brand new world and a brand new order of issues. A frightful anguish commenced to torture-my coronary heart as with red-hot pincers. Each successive minute appeared to me directly however a second and but a century. In the meantime the ceremony was continuing, and I shortly discovered myself transported removed from that world of which my newly born wishes had been furiously besieging the doorway. However I answered ‘Sure’ once I wished to say ‘No,’ although all inside me protested in opposition to the violence carried out to my soul by my tongue. Some occult energy appeared to pressure the phrases from my throat in opposition to my will. Thus it’s, maybe, that so many younger ladies stroll to the altar firmly resolved to refuse in a startling method the husband imposed upon them, and that but not one ever fulfils her intention. Thus it’s, probably, that so many poor novices take the veil, although they’ve resolved to tear it into shreds for the time being when known as upon to utter the vows. One dares not thus trigger so nice a scandal to all current, nor deceive the expectation of so many individuals. All these eyes, all these wills appear to overwhelm upon you want a cope of lead, and, furthermore, measures have been so effectively taken, the whole lot has been so completely organized beforehand and after a vogue so evidently irrevocable, that the need yields to the burden of circumstances and totally breaks down.

Because the ceremony proceeded the options of the honest unknown modified their expression. Her look had at first been one in all caressing tenderness; it modified to an air of disdain and of mortification, as if at not having been in a position to make itself understood.

With an effort of will ample to have uprooted a mountain, I strove to cry out that I might not be a priest, however I couldn’t converse; my tongue appeared nailed to my palate, and I discovered it unimaginable to specific my will by the least syllable of negation. Although totally awake, I felt like one underneath the affect of a nightmare, who vainly strives to shriek out the one phrase upon which life relies upon.

She appeared acutely aware of the martyrdom I used to be present process, and, as if to encourage me, she gave me a glance replete with divinest promise. Her eyes had been a poem; their each look was a track.

She stated to me:

‘If thou wilt be mine, I shall make thee happier than God Himself in His paradise. The angels themselves will likely be jealous of thee. Tear off that funeral shroud wherein thou artwork about to wrap thyself. I’m Magnificence, I’m Youth, I’m Life. Come to me! Collectively we will be Love. Can Jehovah provide thee aught in change? Our lives will move on like a dream, in a single everlasting kiss.

‘Fling forth the wine of that chalice, and thou artwork free. I’ll conduct thee to the Unknown Isles. Thou shalt sleep in my bosom upon a mattress of massy gold underneath a silver pavilion, for I like thee and would take thee away from thy God, earlier than whom so many noble hearts pour forth floods of affection which by no means attain even the steps of His throne!’

These phrases appeared to drift to my ears in a rhythm of infinite sweetness, for her look was really sonorous, and the utterances of her eyes had been reechoed within the depths of my coronary heart as if dwelling lips had breathed them into my life. I felt myself prepared to resign God, and but my tongue mechanically fulfilled all of the formalities of the ceremony. The honest one gave me one other look, so beseeching, so despairing that eager blades appeared to pierce my coronary heart, and I felt my bosom transfixed by extra swords than these of Our Woman of Sorrows.

All was consummated; I had change into a priest.

By no means was deeper anguish painted on human face than upon hers. The maiden who beholds her affianced lover abruptly fall lifeless at her facet, the mom bending over the empty cradle of her youngster, Eve seated on the threshold of the gate of Paradise, the miser who finds a stone substituted for his stolen treasure, the poet who unintentionally permits the one manuscript of his best work to fall into the fireplace, couldn’t put on a glance so despairing, so inconsolable. All of the blood had deserted her charming face, leaving it whiter than marble; her lovely arms hung lifelessly on both facet of her physique as if their muscle tissue had abruptly relaxed, and she or he sought the assist of a pillar, for her yielding limbs virtually betrayed her. As for myself, I staggered towards the door of the church, furious as demise, my brow bathed with a sweat bloodier than that of Calvary; I felt as if I had been being strangled; the vault appeared to have flattened down upon my shoulders, and it appeared to me that my head alone sustained the entire weight of the dome.

As I used to be about to cross the edge a hand abruptly caught mine—a girl’s hand! I had by no means until then touched the hand of any lady. It was chilly as a serpent’s pores and skin, and but its impress remained upon my wrist, burnt there as if branded by a glowing iron. It was she. ‘Sad man! Sad man! What hast thou carried out?’ she exclaimed in a low voice, and instantly disappeared within the crowd.

The aged bishop handed by. He forged a extreme and scrutinising look upon me. My face offered the wildest facet conceivable: I blushed and turned pale alternately; dazzling lights flashed earlier than my eyes. A companion took pity on me. He seized my arm and led me out. I couldn’t presumably have discovered my method again to the seminary unassisted. On the nook of a avenue, whereas the younger priest’s consideration was momentarily turned in one other course, a negro web page, fantastically garbed, approached me, and with out pausing on his method slipped into my hand just a little pocket-book with gold-embroidered corners, on the identical time giving me an indication to cover it. I hid it in my sleeve, and there stored it till I discovered myself alone in my cell. Then I opened the clasp. There have been solely two leaves inside, bearing the phrases, ‘Clarimonde. On the Concini Palace.’ So little acquainted was I at the moment with the issues of this world that I had by no means heard of Clarimonde, celebrated as she was, and I had no concept as to the place the Concini Palace was located. I hazarded a thousand conjectures, every extra extravagant than the final; however, in fact, I cared little whether or not she had been a terrific woman or a courtesan, in order that I may however see her as soon as extra.

My love, though the expansion of a single hour, had taken imperishable root. I didn’t even dream of making an attempt to tear it up, so totally was I satisfied such a factor can be unimaginable. That lady had fully taken possession of me. One look from her had sufficed to alter my very nature. She had breathed her will into my life, and I now not lived in myself, however in her and for her. I gave myself as much as a thousand extravagancies. I kissed the place upon my hand which she had touched, and I repeated her identify over and over for hours in succession. I solely wanted to shut my eyes so as to see her distinctly as if she had been really current; and I reiterated to myself the phrases she had uttered in my ear on the church porch: ‘Sad man! Sad man! What hast thou carried out?’ I comprehended eventually the complete horror of my scenario, and the funereal and terrible restraints of the state into which I had simply entered turned clearly revealed to me. To be a priest!—that’s, to be chaste, to by no means love, to look at no distinction of intercourse or age, to show from the sight of all magnificence, to place out one’s personal eyes, to cover for ever crouching within the chill shadows of some church or cloister, to go to none however the dying, to look at by unknown corpses, and ever bear about with one the black soutane as a garb of mourning for oneself, in order that your very costume may function a pall in your coffin.

And I felt life rising inside me like a subterranean lake, increasing and overflowing; my blood leaped fiercely via my arteries; my long-restrained youth abruptly burst into energetic being, just like the aloe which blooms however as soon as in 100 years, after which bursts into blossom with a clap of thunder.

What may I do so as to see Clarimonde as soon as extra? I had no pretext to supply for wanting to go away the seminary, not figuring out any particular person within the metropolis. I might not even be capable of stay there however a short while, and was solely ready my project to the curacy which I have to thereafter occupy. I attempted to take away the bars of the window; but it surely was at a fearful peak from the bottom, and I discovered that as I had no ladder it could be ineffective to think about escaping thus. And, moreover, I may descend thence solely by night time in any occasion, and afterward how ought to I be capable of discover my method via the inextricable labyrinth of streets? All these difficulties, which to many would have appeared altogether insignificant, had been gigantic to me, a poor seminarist who had fallen in love solely the day earlier than for the primary time, with out expertise, with out cash, with out apparel.

‘Ah!’ cried I to myself in my blindness, ‘had been I not a priest I may have seen her every single day; I may need been her lover, her partner. As a substitute of being wrapped on this dismal shroud of mine I might have had clothes of silk and velvet, golden chains, a sword, and honest plumes like different good-looking younger cavaliers. My hair, as a substitute of being dishonoured by the tonsure, would move down upon my neck in waving curls; I might have a advantageous waxed moustache; I might be a gallant.’ However one hour handed earlier than an altar, just a few rapidly articulated phrases, had for ever minimize me off from the variety of the dwelling, and I had myself sealed down the stone of my very own tomb; I had with my very own hand bolted the gate of my jail! I went to the window. The sky was fantastically blue; the bushes had donned their spring robes; nature gave the impression to be making parade of an ironical pleasure. The Place was full of folks, some going, others coming; younger beaux and younger beauties had been sauntering in {couples} towards the groves and gardens; merry youths handed by, cheerily trolling refrains of drinking-songs—it was all an image of vivacity, life, animation, gaiety, which fashioned a bitter distinction with my mourning and my solitude. On the steps of the gate sat a younger mom enjoying along with her youngster. She kissed its little rosy mouth nonetheless impearled with drops of milk, and carried out, so as to amuse it, a thousand divine little puerilities corresponding to solely moms know the right way to invent. The daddy standing at just a little distance smiled gently upon the charming group, and with folded arms appeared to hug his pleasure to his coronary heart. I couldn’t endure that spectacle. I closed the window with violence, and flung myself on my mattress, my coronary heart full of frightful hate and jealousy, and gnawed my fingers and my bedcovers like a tiger that has handed ten days with out meals.

I do know not how lengthy I remained on this situation, however eventually, whereas writhing on the mattress in a match of spasmodic fury, I abruptly perceived the Abbé Sérapion, who was standing erect within the centre of the room, watching me attentively. Crammed with disgrace of myself, I let my head fall upon my breast and coated my face with my palms.

‘Romuald, my buddy, one thing very extraordinary is transpiring inside you,’ noticed Sérapion, after just a few moments’ silence; ‘your conduct is altogether inexplicable. You—all the time so quiet, so pious, so light—you to rage in your cell like a wild beast! Take heed, brother—don’t hearken to the solutions of the satan The Evil Spirit, livid that you’ve consecrated your self for ever to the Lord, is prowling round you want a ravening wolf and making a final effort to acquire possession of you. As a substitute of permitting your self to be conquered, my pricey Romuald, make to your self a cuirass of prayers, a buckler of mortifications, and fight the enemy like a valiant man; you’ll then assuredly overcome him. Advantage have to be proved by temptation, and gold comes forth purer from the palms of the assayer. Worry not. By no means enable your self to change into discouraged. Essentially the most watchful and steadfast souls are at moments liable to such temptation. Pray, quick, meditate, and the Evil Spirit will depart from you.’

The phrases of the Abbé Sérapion restored me to myself, and I turned just a little extra calm. ‘I got here,’ he continued, ‘to let you know that you’ve been appointed to the curacy of C———. The priest who had cost of it has simply died, and Monseigneur the Bishop has ordered me to have you ever put in there directly. Be prepared, subsequently, to start out to-morrow.’ I responded with an inclination of the pinnacle, and the Abbé retired. I opened my missal and commenced studying some prayers, however the letters turned confused and blurred underneath my eyes, the thread of the concepts entangled itself hopelessly in my mind, and the quantity eventually fell from my palms with out my being conscious of it.

To go away to-morrow with out having been in a position to see her once more, so as to add yet one more barrier to the various already interposed between us, to lose for ever all hope of with the ability to meet her, besides, certainly, via a miracle! Even to write down to her, alas! can be unimaginable, for by whom may I dispatch my letter? With my sacred character of priest, to whom may I dare unbosom myself, in whom may I confide? I turned a prey to the bitterest anxiousness.

Then abruptly recurred to me the phrases of the Abbé Sérapion relating to the artifices of the satan; and the unusual character of the journey, the supernatural great thing about Clarimonde, the phosphoric gentle of her eyes, the burning imprint of her hand, the agony into which she had thrown me, the sudden change wrought inside me when all my piety vanished in a single prompt—these and different issues clearly testified to the work of the Evil One, and maybe that satiny hand was however the glove which hid his claws. Crammed with terror at these fancies, I once more picked up the missal which had slipped from my knees and fallen upon the ground, and as soon as extra gave myself as much as prayer.

Subsequent morning Sérapion got here to take me away. Two mules freighted with our depressing valises awaited us on the gate. He mounted one, and I the opposite in addition to I knew how.

As we handed alongside the streets of town, I gazed attentively in any respect the home windows and balconies within the hope of seeing Clarimonde, but it surely was but early within the morning, and town had hardly opened its eyes. Mine sought to penetrate the blinds and window-curtains of all of the palaces earlier than which we had been passing. Sérapion probably attributed this curiosity to my admiration of the structure, for he slackened the tempo of his animal so as to give me time to go searching me. Finally we handed town gates and commenced to mount the hill past. Once we arrived at its summit I turned to take a final take a look at the place the place Clarimonde dwelt. The shadow of a terrific cloud hung over all town; the contrasting colors of its blue and purple roofs had been misplaced within the uniform half-tint, via which right here and there floated upward, like white flakes of froth, the smoke of freshly kindled fires. By a singular optical impact one edifice, which surpassed in peak all of the neighbouring buildings that had been nonetheless dimly veiled by the vapours, towered up, honest and lustrous with the gilding of a solitary beam of daylight—though really greater than a league away it appeared fairly close to. The smallest particulars of its structure had been plainly distinguishable—the turrets, the platforms, the window-casements, and even the swallow-tailed weather-vanes.

‘What’s that palace I see over there, all lighted up by the solar?’ I requested Sérapion. He shaded his eyes along with his hand, and having appeared within the course indicated, replied: ‘It’s the historic palace which the Prince Concini has given to the courtesan Clarimonde. Terrible issues are carried out there!’

At that prompt, I do know not but whether or not it was a actuality or an phantasm, I fancied I noticed gliding alongside the terrace a shapely white determine, which gleamed for a second in passing and as shortly vanished. It was Clarimonde.

Oh, did she know that at that very hour, all feverish and stressed—from the peak of the rugged highway which separated me from her, and which, alas! I may by no means extra descend—I used to be directing my eyes upon the palace the place she dwelt, and which a mocking beam of daylight appeared to carry nigh to me, as if inviting me to enter therein as its lord? Undoubtedly she should have recognized it, for her soul was too sympathetically united with mine to not have felt its least emotional thrill, and that refined sympathy it should have been which prompted her to climb—though clad solely in her nightdress—to the summit of the terrace, amid the icy dews of the morning.

The shadow gained the palace, and the scene turned to the attention solely a immobile ocean of roofs and gables, amid which one mountainous undulation was distinctly seen. Sérapion urged his mule ahead, my very own directly adopted on the identical gait, and a pointy angle within the highway eventually hid town of S——— for ever from my eyes, as I used to be destined by no means to return thither. On the shut of a weary three-days’ journey via dismal nation fields, we caught sight of the cock upon the steeple of the church which I used to be to take cost of, peeping above the bushes, and after having adopted some winding roads fringed with thatched cottages and little gardens, we discovered ourselves in entrance of the façade, which definitely possessed few options of magnificence. A porch ornamented with some mouldings, and two or three pillars rudely hewn from sandstone; a tiled roof with counterforts of the identical sandstone because the pillars—that was all. To the left lay the cemetery, overgrown with excessive weeds, and having a terrific iron cross rising up in its centre; to the appropriate stood the presbytery underneath the shadow of the church. It was a home of probably the most excessive simplicity and frigid cleanliness. We entered the enclosure. A couple of chickens had been choosing up some oats scattered upon the bottom; accustomed, seemingly, to the black behavior of ecclesiastics, they confirmed no concern of our presence and scarcely troubled themselves to get out of our method. A hoarse, wheezy barking fell upon our ears, and we noticed an aged canine operating towards us.

It was my predecessor’s canine. He had boring bleared eyes, grizzled hair, and each mark of the best age to which a canine can presumably attain. I patted him gently, and he proceeded directly to march alongside beside me with an air of satisfaction unspeakable. A really outdated lady, who had been the housekeeper of the previous curé, additionally got here to fulfill us, and after having invited me into just a little again parlour, requested whether or not I supposed to retain her. I replied that I might maintain her, and the canine, and the chickens, and all of the furnishings her grasp had bequeathed her at his demise. At this she turned pretty transported with pleasure, and the Abbé Sérapion directly paid her the worth which she requested for her little property.

As quickly as my set up was over, the Abbé Sérapion returned to the seminary. I used to be, subsequently, left alone, with nobody however myself to look to for assist or counsel. The considered Clarimonde once more started to hang-out me, and regardless of all my endeavours to banish it, I all the time discovered it current in my meditations. One night, whereas promenading in my little backyard alongside the walks bordered with box-plants, I fancied that I noticed via the elm-trees the determine of a girl, who adopted my each motion, and that I beheld two sea-green eyes gleaming via the foliage; but it surely was solely an phantasm, and on going spherical to the opposite facet of the backyard, I may discover nothing besides a footprint on the sanded stroll—a footprint so small that it appeared to have been made by the foot of a kid. The backyard was enclosed by very excessive partitions. I searched each nook and nook of it, however may uncover nobody there. I’ve by no means succeeded in totally accounting for this circumstance, which, in spite of everything, was nothing in contrast with the unusual issues which occurred to me afterward.

For an entire yr I lived thus, filling all of the duties of my calling with probably the most scrupulous exactitude, praying and fasting, exhorting and lending ghostly assist to the sick, and bestowing alms even to the extent of ceaselessly depriving myself of the very necessaries of life. However I felt a terrific aridness inside me, and the sources of grace appeared closed in opposition to me. I by no means discovered that happiness which ought to spring from the fulfilment of a holy mission; my ideas had been distant, and the phrases of Clarimonde had been ever upon my lips like an involuntary chorus. Oh, brother, meditate effectively on this! By way of having however as soon as lifted my eyes to look upon a girl, via one fault apparently so venial, I’ve for years remained a sufferer to probably the most depressing agonies, and the happiness of my life has been destroyed for ever.

I cannot longer dwell upon these defeats, or on these inward victories invariably adopted by but extra horrible falls, however will directly proceed to the information of my story. One night time my door-bell was lengthy and violently rung. The aged housekeeper arose and opened to the stranger, and the determine of a person, whose complexion was deeply bronzed, and who was richly clad in a overseas costume, with a poniard at his girdle, appeared underneath the rays of Barbara’s lantern. Her first impulse was one in all terror, however the stranger reassured her, and said that he desired to see me directly on issues referring to my holy calling. Barbara invited him upstairs, the place I used to be on the purpose of retiring. The stranger advised me that his mistress, a really noble woman, was mendacity on the level of demise, and desired to see a priest. I replied that I used to be ready to observe him, took with me the sacred articles obligatory for excessive unction, and descended in all haste. Two horses black because the night time itself stood with out the gate, pawing the bottom with impatience, and veiling their chests with lengthy streams of smoky vapour exhaled from their nostrils. He held the stirrup and aided me to mount upon one; then, merely laying his hand upon the pommel of the saddle, he vaulted on the opposite, pressed the animal’s sides along with his knees, and loosened rein. The horse bounded ahead with the rate of an arrow. Mine, of which the stranger held the bridle, additionally began off at a swift gallop, maintaining along with his companion. We devoured the highway. The bottom flowed backward beneath us in a protracted streaked line of pale grey, and the black silhouettes of the bushes appeared fleeing by us on both facet like a military in rout. We handed via a forest so profoundly gloomy that I felt my flesh creep within the chill darkness with superstitious concern. The showers of brilliant sparks which flew from the stony highway underneath the ironshod ft of our horses remained glowing in our wake like a fiery path; and had anybody at that hour of the night time beheld us each—my information and myself—he should have taken us for 2 spectres using upon nightmares. Witch-fires ever and anon flitted throughout the highway earlier than us, and the night-birds shrieked fearsomely within the depth of the woods past, the place we beheld at intervals glow the phosphorescent eyes of untamed cats. The manes of the horses turned increasingly more dishevelled, the sweat streamed over their flanks, and their breath got here via their nostrils arduous and quick. However when he discovered them slacking tempo, the information reanimated them by uttering a wierd, gutteral, unearthly cry, and the gallop recommenced with fury. Finally the whirlwind race ceased; an enormous black mass pierced via with many brilliant factors of sunshine abruptly rose earlier than us, the hoofs of our horses echoed louder upon a robust picket drawbridge, and we rode underneath a terrific vaulted archway which darkly yawned between two monumental towers. Some nice pleasure evidently reigned within the fortress. Servants with torches had been crossing the courtyard in each course, and above lights had been ascending and descending from touchdown to touchdown. I obtained a confused glimpse of huge lots of structure—columns, arcades, flights of steps, stairways—a royal voluptuousness and elfin magnificence of development worthy of fairyland. A negro web page—the identical who had earlier than introduced me the pill from Clarimonde, and whom I immediately recognised—approached to assist me in dismounting, and the major-domo, attired in black velvet with a gold chain about his neck, superior to fulfill me, supporting himself upon an ivory cane. Massive tears had been falling from his eyes and streaming over his cheeks and white beard. ‘Too late!’ he cried, sorrowfully shaking his venerable head. ‘Too late, sir priest! However if in case you have not been in a position to save the soul, come no less than to look at by the poor physique.’

He took my arm and carried out me to the death-chamber. I wept not much less bitterly than he, for I had realized that the lifeless one was none aside from that Clarimonde whom I had so deeply and so wildly liked. A prie-dieu stood on the foot of the mattress; a bluish flame flickering in a bronze patern crammed all of the room with a wan, misleading gentle, right here and there bringing out within the darkness at intervals some projection of furnishings or cornice. In a chiselled urn upon the desk there was a light white rose, whose leaves—excepting one that also held—had all fallen, like odorous tears, to the foot of the vase. A damaged black masks, a fan, and disguises of each selection, which had been mendacity on the armchairs, bore witness that demise had entered abruptly and unannounced into that luxurious dwelling. With out daring to forged my eyes upon the mattress, I knelt down and commenced to repeat the Psalms for the Lifeless, with exceeding fervour, thanking God that He had positioned the tomb between me and the reminiscence of this lady, in order that I’d thereafter be capable of utter her identify in my prayers as a reputation for ever sanctified by demise. However my fervour steadily weakened, and I fell insensibly right into a reverie. That chamber bore no semblance to a chamber of demise. In lieu of the fetid and cadaverous odours which I had been accustomed to breathe throughout such funereal vigils, a languorous vapour of Oriental fragrance—I do know not what amorous odour of lady—softly floated via the tepid air. That pale gentle appeared slightly a twilight gloom contrived for voluptuous pleasure, than an alternative to the yellow-flickering watch-tapers which shine by the facet of corpses. I assumed upon the unusual future which enabled me to fulfill Clarimonde once more on the very second when she was misplaced to me for ever, and a sigh of regretful anguish escaped from my breast. Then it appeared to me that some one behind me had additionally sighed, and I turned spherical to look. It was solely an echo. However in that second my eyes fell upon the mattress of demise which they’d until then averted. The purple damask curtains, embellished with massive flowers labored in embroidery and looped up with gold bullion, permitted me to behold the honest lifeless, mendacity at full size, with palms joined upon her bosom. She was coated with a linen wrapping of dazzling whiteness, which fashioned a robust distinction with the gloomy purple of the hangings, and was of so advantageous a texture that it hid nothing of her physique’s charming type, and allowed the attention to observe these lovely outlines—undulating just like the neck of a swan—which even demise had not robbed of their supple grace. She appeared an alabaster statue executed by some skilful sculptor to put upon the tomb of a queen, or slightly, maybe, like a slumbering maiden over whom the silent snow had woven a spotless veil.

I may now not preserve my constrained perspective of prayer. The air of the alcove intoxicated me, that febrile fragrance of half-faded roses penetrated my very mind, and I commenced to tempo restlessly up and down the chamber, pausing at every flip earlier than the bier to ponder the swish corpse mendacity beneath the transparency of its shroud. Wild fancies got here thronging to my mind. I assumed to myself that she won’t, maybe, be actually lifeless; that she may solely have feigned demise for the aim of bringing me to her fortress, after which declaring her love. At one time I even thought I noticed her foot transfer underneath the whiteness of the coverings, and barely disarrange the lengthy straight folds of the winding-sheet.

After which I requested myself: ‘Is that this certainly Clarimonde? What proof have I that it’s she? Won’t that black web page have handed into the service of another woman? Absolutely, I have to be going mad to torture and afflict myself thus!’ However my coronary heart answered with a fierce throbbing: ‘It’s she; it’s she certainly!’ I approached the mattress once more, and glued my eyes with redoubled consideration upon the item of my incertitude. Ah, should I confess it? That beautiful perfection of bodily type, though purified and made sacred by the shadow of demise, affected me extra voluptuously than it ought to have carried out; and that repose so carefully resembled slumber that one may effectively have mistaken it for such. I forgot that I had come there to carry out a funeral ceremony; I fancied myself a younger bridegroom getting into the chamber of the bride, who all modestly hides her honest face, and thru coyness seeks to maintain herself wholly veiled. Heartbroken with grief, but wild with hope, shuddering directly with concern and pleasure, I bent over her and grasped the nook of the sheet. I lifted it again, holding my breath all of the whereas via concern of waking her. My arteries throbbed with such violence that I felt them hiss via my temples, and the sweat poured from my brow in streams, as if I had lifted a mighty slab of marble. There, certainly, lay Clarimonde, whilst I had seen her on the church on the day of my ordination. She was not much less charming than then. Together with her, demise appeared however a final coquetry. The pallor of her cheeks, the much less sensible carnation of her lips, her lengthy eyelashes lowered and relieving their darkish fringe in opposition to that white pores and skin, lent her an unspeakably seductive facet of melancholy chastity and psychological struggling; her lengthy free hair, nonetheless intertwined with some little blue flowers, made a shining pillow for her head, and veiled the nudity of her shoulders with its thick ringlets; her lovely palms, purer, extra diaphanous, than the Host, had been crossed on her bosom in an perspective of pious relaxation and silent prayer, which served to counteract all which may have confirmed in any other case too alluring—even after demise—within the beautiful roundness and ivory polish of her naked arms from which the pearl bracelets had not but been eliminated. I remained lengthy in mute contemplation, and the extra I gazed, the much less may I persuade myself that life had actually deserted that stunning physique for ever. I have no idea whether or not it was an phantasm or a mirrored image of the lamplight, but it surely appeared to me that the blood was once more commencing to flow into underneath that lifeless pallor, though she remained all immobile. I laid my hand calmly on her arm; it was chilly, however not colder than her hand on the day when it touched mine on the portals of the church. I resumed my place, bending my face above her, and bathing her cheek with the nice and cozy dew of my tears. Ah, what bitter emotions of despair and helplessness, what agonies unutterable did I endure in that lengthy watch! Vainly did I want that I may have gathered all my life into one mass that I’d give all of it to her, and breathe into her chill stays the flame which devoured me. The night time superior, and feeling the second of everlasting separation method, I couldn’t deny myself the final unhappy candy pleasure of imprinting a kiss upon the lifeless lips of her who had been my solely love…. Oh, miracle! A faint breath mingled itself with my breath, and the mouth of Clarimonde responded to the passionate stress of mine. Her eyes unclosed, and lighted up with one thing of their former brilliancy; she uttered a protracted sigh, and uncrossing her arms, handed them round my neck with a glance of ineffable delight. ‘Ah, it’s thou, Romuald!’ she murmured in a voice languishingly candy because the final vibrations of a harp. ‘What ailed thee, dearest? I waited so lengthy for thee that I’m lifeless; however we are actually betrothed: I can see thee and go to thee. Adieu, Romuald, adieu! I like thee. That’s all I wanted to inform thee, and I give thee again the life which thy kiss for a second recalled. We will quickly meet once more.’

Her head fell again, however her arms but encircled me, as if to retain me nonetheless. A livid whirlwind abruptly burst within the window, and entered the chamber. The final remaining leaf of the white rose for a second palpitated on the extremity of the stalk like a butterfly’s wing, then it indifferent itself and flew forth via the open casement, bearing with it the soul of Clarimonde. The lamp was extinguished, and I fell insensible upon the bosom of the attractive lifeless.

Once I got here to myself once more I used to be mendacity on the mattress in my little room on the presbytery, and the outdated canine of the previous curé was licking my hand, which had been hanging down exterior of the covers. Barbara, all trembling with age and anxiousness, was busying herself concerning the room, opening and shutting drawers, and emptying powders into glasses. On seeing me open my eyes, the outdated lady uttered a cry of pleasure, the canine yelped and wagged his tail, however I used to be nonetheless so weak that I couldn’t converse a single phrase or make the slightest movement. Afterward I realized that I had lain thus for 3 days, giving no proof of life past the faintest respiration. These three days don’t reckon in my life, nor may I ever think about whither my spirit had departed throughout these three days; I’ve no recollection of aught referring to them. Barbara advised me that the identical coppery-complexioned man who got here to hunt me on the night time of my departure from the presbytery had introduced me again the following morning in an in depth litter, and departed instantly afterward. Once I turned in a position to acquire my scattered ideas, I reviewed inside my thoughts all of the circumstances of that fateful night time. At first I assumed I had been the sufferer of some magical phantasm, however ere lengthy the recollection of different circumstances, actual and palpable in themselves, got here to forbid that supposition. I couldn’t imagine that I had been dreaming, since Barbara in addition to myself had seen the unusual man along with his two black horses, and described with exactness each element of his determine and attire. However it appeared that none knew of any fortress within the neighbourhood answering to the outline of that wherein I had once more discovered Clarimonde.

One morning I discovered the Abbé Sérapion in my room. Barbara had suggested him that I used to be ailing, and he had include all pace to see me. Though this haste on his half testified to an affectionate curiosity in me, but his go to didn’t trigger me the pleasure which it ought to have carried out. The Abbé Sérapion had one thing penetrating and inquisitorial in his gaze which made me really feel very ailing comfy. His presence crammed me with embarrassment and a way of guilt. On the first look he divined my inside bother, and I hated him for his clairvoyance.

Whereas he inquired after my well being in hypocritically honeyed accents, he always stored his two nice yellow lion-eyes mounted upon me, and plunged his look into my soul like a sounding-lead. Then he requested me how I directed my parish, if I used to be completely happy in it, how I handed the leisure hours allowed me within the intervals of pastoral responsibility, whether or not I had change into acquainted with lots of the inhabitants of the place, what was my favorite studying, and a thousand different such questions. I answered these inquiries as briefly as doable, and he, with out ever ready for my solutions, handed quickly from one topic of question to a different. That dialog had evidently no reference to what he really wished to say. Finally, with none premonition, however as if repeating a chunk of stories which he had recalled on the moment, and feared may in any other case be forgotten subsequently, he abruptly stated, in a transparent vibrant voice, which rang in my ears just like the trumpets of the Final Judgment:

‘The nice courtesan Clarimonde died just a few days in the past, on the shut of an orgie which lasted eight days and eight nights. It was one thing infernally splendid. The abominations of the banquets of Belshazzar and Cleopatra had been re-enacted there. Good God, what age are we dwelling in? The friends had been served by swarthy slaves who spoke an unknown tongue, and who appeared to me to be veritable demons. The livery of the very least amongst them would have served for the gala-dress of an emperor. There have all the time been very unusual tales advised of this Clarimonde, and all her lovers got here to a violent or depressing finish. They used to say that she was a ghoul, a feminine vampire; however I imagine she was none aside from Beelzebub himself.’

He ceased to talk, and commenced to treat me extra attentively than ever, as if to look at the impact of his phrases on me. I couldn’t chorus from beginning once I heard him utter the identify of Clarimonde, and this information of her demise, along with the ache it triggered me by purpose of its coincidence with the nocturnal scenes I had witnessed, crammed me with an agony and terror which my face betrayed, regardless of my utmost endeavours to look composed. Sérapion mounted an anxious and extreme look upon me, after which noticed: ‘My son, I have to warn you that you’re standing with foot raised upon the brink of an abyss; take heed lest you fall therein. Devil’s claws are lengthy, and tombs usually are not all the time true to their belief. The tombstone of Clarimonde needs to be sealed down with a triple seal, for, if report be true, it’s not the primary time she has died. Could God watch over you, Romuald!’

And with these phrases the Abbé walked slowly to the door. I didn’t see him once more at the moment, for he left for S——— virtually instantly.

I turned fully restored to well being and resumed my accustomed duties. The reminiscence of Clarimonde and the phrases of the outdated Abbé had been always in my thoughts; however no extraordinary occasion had occurred to confirm the funereal predictions of Sérapion, and I had commenced to imagine that his fears and my very own terrors had been over-exaggerated, when one night time I had a wierd dream. I had hardly fallen asleep once I heard my bed-curtains drawn aside, as their rings slided again upon the curtain rod with a pointy sound. I rose up shortly upon my elbow, and beheld the shadow of a girl standing erect earlier than me. I recognised Clarimonde instantly. She bore in her hand just a little lamp, formed like these that are positioned in tombs, and its gentle lent her fingers a rosy transparency, which prolonged itself by lessening levels even to the opaque and milky whiteness of her naked arm. Her solely garment was the linen winding-sheet which had shrouded her when mendacity upon the mattress of demise. She sought to assemble its folds over her bosom as if ashamed of being so scantily clad, however her little hand was not equal to the duty. She was so white that the color of the material blended with that of her flesh underneath the pallid rays of the lamp. Enveloped with this refined tissue which betrayed all of the contour of her physique, she appeared slightly the marble statue of some honest vintage bather than a girl endowed with life. However lifeless or dwelling, statue or lady, shadow or physique, her magnificence was nonetheless the identical, solely that the inexperienced gentle of her eyes was much less sensible, and her mouth, as soon as so warmly crimson, was solely tinted with a faint tender rosiness, like that of her cheeks. The little blue flowers which I had seen entwined in her hair had been withered and dry, and had misplaced almost all their leaves, however this didn’t forestall her from being charming—so charming that, however the unusual character of the journey, and the unexplainable method wherein she had entered my room, I felt not even for a second the least concern.

She positioned the lamp on the desk and seated herself on the foot of my mattress; then bending towards me, she stated, in that voice directly silvery clear and but velvety in its candy softness, corresponding to I by no means heard from any lips save hers:

‘I’ve stored thee lengthy in ready, pricey Romuald, and it should have appeared to thee that I had forgotten thee. However I come from afar off, very far off, and from a land whence no different has ever but returned. There may be neither solar nor moon in that land whence I come: all is however area and shadow; there may be neither highway nor pathway: no earth for the foot, no air for the wing; and however behold me right here, for Love is stronger than Loss of life and should conquer him ultimately. Oh what unhappy faces and fearful issues I’ve seen on my method hither! What problem my soul, returned to earth via the facility of will alone, has had find its physique and reinstating itself therein! What horrible efforts I needed to make ere I may elevate the ponderous slab with which they’d coated me! See, the palms of my poor palms are all bruised! Kiss them, candy love, that they could be healed!’ She laid the chilly palms of her palms upon ray mouth, one after the opposite. I kissed them, certainly, many instances, and she or he the whereas watched me with a smile of ineffable affection.

I confess to my disgrace that I had totally forgotten the recommendation of the Abbé Sérapion and the sacred workplace wherewith I had been invested. I had fallen with out resistance, and on the first assault. I had not even made the least effort to repel the tempter. The recent coolness of Clarimonde’s pores and skin penetrated my very own, and I felt voluptuous tremors go over my entire physique. Poor youngster! regardless of all I noticed afterward, I can hardly but imagine she was a demon; no less than she had no look of being such, and by no means did Devil so skilfully conceal his claws and horns. She had drawn her ft up beneath her, and squatted down on the sting of the sofa in an perspective filled with negligent coquetry. Every now and then she handed her little hand via my hair and twisted it into curls, as if attempting how a brand new fashion of carrying it could change into my face. I deserted myself to her palms with probably the most responsible pleasure, whereas she accompanied her light play with the prettiest prattle. Essentially the most exceptional truth was that I felt no astonishment no matter at so extraordinary ah journey, and as in desires one finds no problem in accepting probably the most unbelievable occasions as easy information, so all these circumstances appeared to me completely pure in themselves.

‘I liked thee lengthy ere I noticed thee, pricey Romuald, and sought thee in every single place. Thou wast my dream, and I first noticed thee within the church on the deadly second. I stated directly, “It’s he!” I gave thee a glance into which I threw all of the love I ever had, all of the love I now have, all of the love I shall ever have for thee—a glance that may have damned a cardinal or introduced a king to his knees at my ft in view of all his court docket. Thou remainedst unmoved, preferring thy God to me!

‘Ah, how jealous I’m of that God whom thou didst love and nonetheless lovest greater than me!

‘Woe is me, sad one which I’m! I can by no means have thy coronary heart all to myself, I whom thou didst recall to life with a kiss—lifeless Clarimonde, who for thy sake bursts asunder the gates of the tomb, and involves consecrate to thee a life which she has resumed solely to make thee completely happy!’

All her phrases had been accompanied with probably the most impassioned caresses, which bewildered my sense and my purpose to such an extent, that I didn’t concern to utter a frightful blasphemy for the sake of consoling her, and to declare that I liked her as a lot as God.

Her eyes rekindled and shone like chrysoprases. ‘In fact?—in very reality?—as a lot as God!’ she cried, flinging her lovely arms round me. ‘Since it’s so, thou wilt include me; thou wilt observe me whithersoever I need. Thou wilt forged away thy ugly black behavior. Thou shalt be the proudest and most envied of cavaliers; thou shalt be my lover! To be the acknowledged lover of Clarimonde, who has refused even a Pope! That will likely be one thing to really feel pleased with. Ah, the honest, unspeakably completely happy existence, the attractive golden life we will reside collectively! And when we could depart, my honest sir?’

‘To-morrow! To-morrow!’ I cried in my delirium.

‘To-morrow, then, so let it’s!’ she answered. ‘In the mean time I shall have alternative to alter my bathroom, for this can be a little too gentle and in nowise fitted to a voyage. I have to additionally forthwith notify all my buddies who imagine me lifeless, and mourn for me as deeply as they’re able to doing. The cash, the clothes, the carriages—all will likely be prepared. I shall name for thee at this identical hour. Adieu, pricey coronary heart!’ And she or he calmly touched my brow along with her lips. The lamp went out, the curtains closed once more, and all turned darkish; a leaden, dreamless sleep fell on me and held me unconscious till the morning following.

I awoke later than traditional, and the recollection of this singular journey troubled me throughout the entire day. I lastly persuaded myself that it was a mere vapour of my heated creativeness. However its sensations had been so vivid that it was tough to steer myself that they weren’t actual, and it was not with out some presentiment of what was going to occur that I acquired into mattress eventually, after having prayed God to drive removed from me all ideas of evil, and to guard the chastity of my slumber.

I quickly fell right into a deep sleep, and my dream was continued. The curtains once more parted, and I beheld Clarimonde, not as on the previous event, pale in her pale winding-sheet, with the violets of demise upon her cheeks, however homosexual, sprightly, jaunty, in an outstanding travelling-dress of inexperienced velvet, trimmed with gold lace, and looped up on both facet to permit a glimpse of satin petticoat. Her blond hair escaped in thick ringlets from beneath a broad black felt hat, embellished with white feathers whimsically twisted into numerous shapes. In a single hand she held just a little riding-whip terminated by a golden whistle. She tapped me calmly with it, and exclaimed: ‘Effectively, my advantageous sleeper, is that this the way in which you make your preparations? I assumed I might discover you up and dressed. Come up shortly, we’ve got no time to lose.’

I leaped away from bed directly.

‘Come, costume your self, and allow us to go,’ she continued, pointing to just a little bundle she had introduced along with her. ‘The horses have gotten impatient of delay and champing their bits on the door. We must have been by this time no less than ten leagues distant from right here.’

I dressed myself hurriedly, and she or he handed me the articles of attire herself one after the other, bursting into laughter once in a while at my awkwardness, as she defined to me using a garment once I had made a mistake. She hurriedly organized my hair, and this carried out, held up earlier than me just a little pocket-mirror of Venetian crystal, rimmed with silver filigree-work, and playfully requested: ‘How dost discover thyself now? Wilt have interaction me for thy valet de chambre?’

I used to be now not the identical particular person, and I couldn’t even recognise myself. I resembled my former self not more than a completed statue resembles a block of stone. My outdated face appeared however a rough daub of the one mirrored within the mirror. I used to be good-looking, and my self-importance was sensibly tickled by the metamorphosis.

That elegant attire, that richly embroidered vest had fabricated from me a very completely different personage, and I marvelled on the energy of transformation owned by just a few yards of fabric minimize after a sure sample. The spirit of my costume penetrated my very pores and skin and inside ten minutes extra I had change into one thing of a coxcomb.

With a view to really feel extra comfy in my new apparel, I took a number of turns up and down the room. Clari-monde watched me with an air of maternal pleasure, and appeared effectively glad along with her work. ‘Come, sufficient of this youngster’s play! Allow us to begin, Romuald, pricey. We have now far to go, and we might not get there in time.’ She took my hand and led me forth. All of the doorways opened earlier than her at a contact, and we handed by the canine with out awaking him.

On the gate we discovered Margheritone ready, the identical swarthy groom who had as soon as earlier than been my-escort. He held the bridles of three horses, all black like these which bore us to the fortress—one for me, one for him, one for Clarimonde. These horses should have been Spanish genets born of mares fecundated by a zephyr, for they had been fleet because the wind itself, and the moon, which had simply risen at our departure to gentle us on the way in which, rolled over the sky like a wheel indifferent from her personal chariot. We beheld her on the appropriate leaping from tree to tree, and placing herself out of breath within the effort to maintain up with us. Quickly we stumbled on a stage plain the place, arduous by a clump of bushes, a carriage with 4 vigorous horses awaited us. We entered it, and the postillions urged their animals right into a mad gallop. I had one arm round Clarimonde’s waist, and one in all her palms clasped in mine; her head leaned upon my shoulder, and I felt her bosom, half naked, calmly urgent in opposition to my arm. I had by no means recognized such intense happiness. In that hour I had forgotten the whole lot, and I no extra remembered having ever been a priest than I remembered what I had been doing in my mom’s womb, so nice was the fascination which the evil spirit exerted upon me. From that night time my nature appeared in some kind to have change into halved, and there have been two males inside me, neither of whom knew the opposite. At one second I believed myself a priest who dreamed nightly that he was a gentleman, at one other that I used to be a gentleman who dreamed he was a priest. I may now not distinguish the dream from the truth, nor may I uncover the place the truth started or the place ended the dream. The beautiful younger lord and libertine railed on the priest, the priest loathed the dissolute habits of the younger lord. Two spirals entangled and confounded the one with the opposite, but by no means touching, would afford a good illustration of this bicephalic life which I lived. Regardless of the unusual character of my situation, I don’t imagine that I ever inclined, even for a second, to insanity. I all the time retained with excessive vividness all of the perceptions of my two lives. Solely there was one absurd truth which I couldn’t clarify to myself—particularly, that the consciousness of the identical individuality existed in two males so reverse in character. It was an anomaly for which I couldn’t account—whether or not I believed myself to be the curé of the little village of C———, or Il Signor Romualdo, the titled lover of Clarimonde.

Be that as it could, I lived, no less than I believed that I lived, in Venice. I’ve by no means been in a position to uncover rightly how a lot of phantasm and the way a lot of actuality there was on this unbelievable journey. We dwelt in a terrific palace on the Canaleio, full of frescoes and statues, and containing two Titians within the noblest fashion of the good grasp, which had been hung in Clarimonde’s chamber. It was a palace effectively worthy of a king. We had every our gondola, our barcarolli in household livery, our music corridor, and our particular poet. Clarimonde all the time lived upon a powerful scale; there was one thing of Cleopatra in her nature. As for me, I had the retinue of a prince’s son, and I used to be regarded with as a lot reverential respect as if I had been of the household of one of many twelve Apostles or the 4 Evangelists of the Most Serene Republic. I might not have turned apart to permit even the Doge to go, and I don’t imagine that since Devil fell from heaven, any creature was ever prouder or extra insolent than I. I went to the Ridotto, and performed with a luck which appeared completely infernal. I acquired one of the best of all society—the sons of ruined households, girls of the theatre, shrewd knaves, parasites, hectoring swashbucklers. However however the dissipation of such a life, I all the time remained devoted to Clarimonde. I liked her wildly. She would have excited satiety itself, and chained inconstancy. To have Clarimonde was to have twenty mistresses; ay, to own all girls: so cellular, so diversified of facet, so recent in new charms was she all in herself—a really chameleon of a girl, in sooth. She made you commit along with her the infidelity you’d have dedicated with one other, by donning to perfection the character, the attraction, the fashion of great thing about the girl who appeared to please you. She returned my love a hundred-fold, and it was in useless that the younger patricians and even the Ancients of the Council of Ten made her probably the most magnificent proposals. A Foscari even went as far as to supply to espouse her. She rejected all his overtures. Of gold she had sufficient. She wished now not for something however love—a love youthful, pure, evoked by herself, and which needs to be a primary and final ardour. I might have been completely completely happy however for a cursed nightmare which recurred each night time, and wherein I believed myself to be a poor village curé, practising mortification and penance for my excesses in the course of the day. Reassured by my fixed affiliation along with her, I by no means thought additional of the unusual method wherein I had change into acquainted with Clarimonde. However the phrases of the Abbé Sérapion regarding her recurred usually to my reminiscence, and by no means ceased to trigger me uneasiness.

For a while the well being of Clarimonde had not been so good as traditional; her complexion grew paler daily. The physicians who had been summoned couldn’t comprehend the character of her illness and knew not the right way to deal with it. All of them prescribed some insignificant treatments, and by no means known as a second time. Her paleness, however, visibly elevated, and she or he turned colder and colder, till she appeared virtually as white and lifeless as upon that memorable night time within the unknown fortress. I grieved with anguish unspeakable to behold her thus slowly perishing; and she or he, touched by my agony, smiled upon me sweetly and sadly with the fateful smile of those that really feel that they have to die.

One morning I used to be seated at her bedside, and breakfasting from just a little desk positioned shut at hand, in order that I won’t be obliged to go away her for a single prompt. Within the act of chopping some fruit I unintentionally inflicted slightly a deep gash on my finger. The blood instantly gushed forth in just a little purple jet, and some drops spurted upon Clarimonde. Her eyes flashed, her face abruptly assumed an expression of savage and ferocious pleasure corresponding to I had by no means earlier than noticed in her. She leaped out of her mattress with animal agility—the agility, because it had been, of an ape or a cat—and sprang upon my wound, which she commenced to suck with an air of unutterable pleasure. She swallowed the blood in little mouthfuls, slowly and thoroughly, like a connoisseur tasting a wine from Xeres or Syracuse. Regularly her eyelids half closed, and the pupils of her inexperienced eyes turned rectangular as a substitute of spherical. Every now and then she paused so as to kiss my hand, then she would recommence to press her lips to the lips of the wound so as to coax forth just a few extra ruddy drops. When she discovered that the blood would now not come, she arose with eyes liquid and sensible, rosier than a Could daybreak; her face full and recent, her hand heat and moist—in advantageous, extra lovely than ever, and in probably the most good well being.

‘I shall not die! I shall not die!’ she cried, clinging to my neck, half mad with pleasure. ‘I can love thee but for a very long time. My life is thine, and all that’s of me comes from thee. A couple of drops of thy wealthy and noble blood, extra treasured and stronger than all of the elixirs of the earth, have given me again life.’

This scene lengthy haunted my reminiscence, and impressed me with unusual doubts in regard to Clarimonde; and the identical night, when slumber had transported me to my presbytery, I beheld the Abbé Sérapion, graver and extra anxious of facet than ever. He gazed attentively at me, and sorrowfully exclaimed: ‘Not content material with shedding your soul, you now need additionally to lose your physique. Wretched younger man, into how horrible a plight have you ever fallen!’ The tone wherein he uttered these phrases powerfully affected me, however regardless of its vividness even that impression was quickly dissipated, and a thousand different cares erased it from my thoughts. Finally one night, whereas trying right into a mirror whose traitorous place she had not taken into consideration, I noticed Clarimonde within the act of emptying a powder into the cup of spiced wine which she had lengthy been within the behavior of getting ready after our repasts. I took the cup, feigned to hold it to my lips, after which positioned it on the closest article of furnishings as if intending to complete it at my leisure. Making the most of a second when the honest one’s again was turned, I threw the contents underneath the desk, after which I retired to my chamber and went to mattress, totally resolved to not sleep, however to look at and uncover what ought to come of all this thriller. I didn’t have to attend lengthy, Clarimonde entered in her nightdress, and having eliminated her attire, crept into mattress and lay down beside me. When she felt assured that I used to be asleep, she bared my arm, and drawing a gold pin from her hair, commenced to murmur in a low voice:

‘One drop, just one drop! One ruby on the finish of my needle…. Since thou lovest me but, I have to not die!… Ah, poor love! His lovely blood, so brightly purple, I have to drink it. Sleep, my solely treasure! Sleep, my god, my youngster! I’ll do thee no hurt; I’ll solely take of thy life what I have to to maintain my very own from being for ever extinguished. However that I like thee a lot, I may effectively resolve to produce other lovers whose veins I may drain; however since I’ve recognized thee all different males have change into hateful to me…. Ah, the attractive arm! How spherical it’s! How white it’s! How shall I ever dare to prick this beautiful blue vein!’ And whereas thus murmuring to herself she wept, and I felt her tears raining on my arm as she clasped it along with her palms. Finally she took the resolve, barely punctured me along with her pin, and commenced to suck up the blood which oozed from the place. Though she swallowed just a few drops, the concern of weakening me quickly seized her, and she or he fastidiously tied just a little band round my arm, afterward rubbing the wound with an unguent which instantly cicatrised it. Additional doubts had been unimaginable. The Abbé Sérapion was proper. However this optimistic information, nevertheless, I couldn’t stop to like Clarimonde, and I might gladly of my very own accord have given her all of the blood she required to maintain her factitious life. Furthermore, I felt however little concern of her. The girl appeared to plead with me for the vampire, and what I had already heard and seen sufficed to reassure me fully. In these days I had plenteous veins, which might not have been so simply exhausted as at current; and I might not have considered bargaining for my blood, drop by drop. I might slightly have opened myself the veins of my arm and stated to her: ‘Drink, and should my love infiltrate itself all through thy physique along with my blood!’ I fastidiously averted ever making the least reference to the narcotic drink she had ready for me, or to the incident of the pin, and we lived in probably the most good concord.

But my priestly scruples commenced to torment me greater than ever, and I used to be at a loss to think about what new penance I may invent so as to mortify and subdue my flesh. Though these visions had been involuntary, and although I didn’t really take part in something referring to them, I couldn’t dare to the touch the physique of Christ with palms so impure and a thoughts defiled by such debauches whether or not actual or imaginary. Within the effort to keep away from falling underneath the affect of those wearisome hallucinations, I strove to stop myself from being overcome by sleep. I held my eyelids open with my fingers, and stood for hours collectively leaning upright in opposition to the wall, combating sleep with all my may; however the mud of drowsiness invariably gathered upon my eyes eventually, and discovering all resistance ineffective, I must let my arms fall within the extremity of despairing weariness, and the present of slumber would once more bear me away to the perfidious shores. Sérapion addressed me with probably the most vehement exhortations, severely reproaching me for my softness and need of fervour. Lastly, sooner or later once I was extra wretched than traditional, he stated to me: ‘There may be however a method by which you’ll be able to acquire aid from this continuous torment, and although it’s an excessive measure it have to be made use of; violent ailments require violent treatments. I do know the place Clarimonde is buried. It’s obligatory that we will disinter her stays, and that you just shall behold in how pitiable a state the item of your love is. Then you’ll now not be tempted to lose your soul for the sake of an unclean corpse devoured by worms, and able to crumble into mud. That can assuredly restore you to your self.’ In my opinion, I used to be so bored with this double life that I directly consented, wanting to determine past a doubt whether or not a priest or a gentleman had been the sufferer of delusion. I had change into totally resolved both to kill one of many two males inside me for the good thing about the opposite, or else to kill each, for thus horrible an existence couldn’t final lengthy and be endured. The Abbé Sérapion offered himself with a mattock, a lever, and a lantern, and at midnight we wended our strategy to the cemetery of ———, the placement and place of which had been completely acquainted to him. After having directed the rays of the darkish lantern upon the inscriptions of a number of tombs, we got here eventually upon a terrific slab, half hid by large weeds and devoured by mosses and parasitic crops, whereupon we deciphered the opening traces of the epitaph:

Right here lies Clarimonde
Who was famed in her life-time
Because the fairest of girls.*

* Ici gît Clarimonde
Qui fut de son vivant
La plus belle du monde.

The damaged great thing about the traces is unavoidably
misplaced within the translation.

‘It’s right here for sure,’ muttered Sérapion, and inserting his lantern on the bottom, he compelled the purpose of the lever underneath the sting of the stone and commenced to boost it. The stone yielded, and he proceeded to work with the mattock. Darker and extra silent than the night time itself, I stood by and watched him do it, whereas he, bending over his dismal toil, streamed with sweat, panted, and his hard-coming breath appeared to have the tough tone of a demise rattle. It was a bizarre scene, and had any individuals from with out beheld us, they might assuredly have taken us slightly for profane wretches and shroud-stealers than for clergymen of God. There was one thing grim and fierce in Sérapion’s zeal which lent him the air of a demon slightly than of an apostle or an angel, and his nice aquiline face, with all its stern options, introduced out in robust aid by the lantern-light, had one thing fearsome in it which enhanced the disagreeable fancy. I felt an icy sweat come out upon my brow in large beads, and my hair stood up with a hideous concern. Inside the depths of my very own coronary heart I felt that the act of the austere Sérapion was an abominable sacrilege; and I may have prayed {that a} triangle of fireplace would challenge from the entrails of the darkish clouds, closely rolling above us, to cut back him to cinders. The owls which had been nestling within the cypress-trees, startled by the gleam of the lantern, flew in opposition to it once in a while, hanging their dusty wings in opposition to its panes, and uttering plaintive cries of lamentation; wild foxes yelped within the far darkness, and a thousand sinister noises indifferent themselves from the silence. Finally Séra-pion’s mattock struck the coffin itself, making its planks re-echo with a deep sonorous sound, with that horrible sound nothingness utters when stricken. He wrenched aside and tore up the lid, and I beheld Clarimonde, pallid as a determine of marble, with palms joined; her white winding-sheet made however one fold from her head to her ft. A bit of crimson drop sparkled like a speck of dew at one nook of her colourless mouth. Sérapion, at this spectacle, burst into fury: ‘Ah, thou artwork right here, demon! Impure courtesan! Drinker of blood and gold! ‘And he flung holy water upon the corpse and the coffin, over which he traced the signal of the cross along with his sprinkler. Poor Clarimonde had no sooner been touched by the blessed spray than her lovely physique crumbled into mud, and have become solely a shapeless and frightful mass of cinders and half-calcined bones.

‘Behold your mistress, my Lord Romuald!’ cried the inexorable priest, as he pointed to those unhappy stays. ‘Will you be simply tempted after this to promenade on the Lido or at Fusina together with your magnificence?’ I coated my face with my palms, an unlimited wreck had taken place inside me. I returned to my presbytery, and the noble Lord Romuald, the lover of Clarimonde, separated himself from the poor priest with whom he had stored such unusual firm so lengthy. However as soon as solely, the next night time, I noticed Clarimonde. She stated to me, as she had stated the primary time on the portals of the church: ‘Sad man! Sad man! What hast thou carried out? Wherefore have hearkened to that imbecile priest? Wert thou not completely happy? And what hurt had I ever carried out thee that thou shouldst violate my poor tomb, and lay naked the miseries of my nothingness? All communication between our souls and our our bodies is henceforth for ever damaged. Adieu! Thou wilt but remorse me!’ She vanished in air as smoke, and I by no means noticed her extra.

Alas! she spoke really certainly. I’ve regretted her greater than as soon as, and I remorse her nonetheless. My soul’s peace has been very dearly purchased. The love of God was not an excessive amount of to switch such a love as hers. And this, brother, is the story of my youth. By no means gaze upon a girl, and stroll overseas solely with eyes ever mounted upon the bottom; for nevertheless chaste and watchful one could also be, the error of a single second is sufficient to make one lose eternity. lose eternity.

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